I’m far too exhausted to go through this repeatedly (email, RTV, here…) so forgive me for copying & pasting my most recent RTV News post below. You’ll see why.
I mentioned a News post or two ago that I had been fielding personal crises. They have escalated now to the point that my work here has suffered, and I think for that I owe you an explanation. To be blunt, my daughter has severe emotional issues. She’s bipolar like her mother (that would be me), but unlike me she’s currently unmedicated. I won’t trouble you with why, but it is temporary and unfortunate. She has emotional episodes frequently. Typically I am very patient because I know what it’s like. For the past three solid weeks, she’s been in serious emotional crisis. I’m talking about half a dozen panic attacks a day. We’re both home all the time and no one else is around, so it falls to me to serve as support and guidance. This is difficult and very taxing for both of us.
I’m doing the best I can. I am in the process of switching bedrooms with her so she can have more space. I have the entire apartment for my “stuff,” so I don’t mind it and honestly should have thought of it before. But this need (or rather solution) is one in a series of solutions after a series of traumatizing “discussions” with her that eventually led to epiphanies of what each problem actually was. . . so I think you might have an idea of why I’ve been lax in updating the Summer Issue. I’m currently on day 3 of who knows how many, moving rooms with her. The entire house looks like somebody shook it and then kicked it down a couple of flights of stairs. My ability to cope is at about 5% of normal. So all I can say is, I’ll be back when this passes, hopefully within a few days. Getting her settled in a new space should help for a while. I’ll finish the issue then, and I’m sorry this has created problems for our readers.
Your continued patience is sincerely appreciated.
— Sheta
About Sheta Kaey
I’m sorry your daughter’s going through this. At the time that I was sexually assaulted, I was also bipolar but didn’t know it. I went through a similar thing.The attack triggered constant, ongoing panic. I would have panic attacks on and off for about 5 hours a day. I have paradoxical reactions to most medications. Most anti-anxiety meds actually backfire on me in a serious way. I took tons of the anti-anxiety herb Kava Kava, which actually isn’t recommended because of its potential to impact the liver at high doses. 5 HTP might help and it is readily avialiable, but its actions are more subtle. For me this debilitating cycle of panic went on for about a year. Then the times between panic attacks became longer and longer.
In 2002, when my paternal grandmother died, I began experiencing panic attacks again. Again the doctors tried medications but they only made things worse. The only thing that helped was biofeedback. I learned to breathe differently and a variety of techniques to refocus my mind. The only time that this hasn’t helped was when I started having panic attacks due to the fact that my doctor raised my dose of Levothyroxine from .25 mg to .75 mg, and blamed the resulting high blood pressure on the fact that I’m a large person instead of looking at my medications. It turns out that I can’t tolerate thyroid medication either. It created an artificial state of hyperthyroidism and took three months to entirely clear my system.
I don’t know if anything I’ve told you here might be useful. I hope it might. Outside of asthma attacks, panic attacks are, in my opinion, the absolute worst thing to go through.
Wishing you and your daughter well.
Hello Sheta,
! Concentrate your energy on both of your well-being.
just discovered your message here, stupid me first went to rending the veil instead of taking a peek at the blog first!
Please don´t worry, we won´t run off
I know I´m pretty much a newbie here, but if there is anything I can do to help (keep an eye on the forum or something like that, you know my English is not perfect), just e-mail me!