The focus of this blog will shock you. I can’t help that. The subject matter is at the very least unconventional. I’ve spent so long in the thick of unconventionality that I forgot what it was like to look in from the outside. It may or may not comfort you to know (or confirm, perhaps) that I was always a fringe-dweller. Let me explain briefly what’s going on. There’s a bit of backstory.

Since I was a child I’ve had unusual experiences, starting at age five, as a matter of fact. I got my first tarot deck for my twelfth birthday. I became obsessed with the Ouija board when I was 14. I’ve seen ghosts, had premonitions, and generally been a magnet for the paranormal. It’s not like you see in the movies (most of the time), but it’s not exactly run-of-the-mill, either. At 16 I dabbled in witchcraft. Then I grew up. While many people can claim all or some of these things, upon growing up the majority of those people can say they left all that behind. I did not.

Perhaps it was partially due to my primarily secular upbringing, but I count that as a blessing. Even when not focused on “woo-woo” stuff, I was ever a rebel and despised being told what or how to think. I was always the outsider in any given group or situation. There was always something different about me. You all know it. You were there. When I was 17, though, I sent a letter to a Christian preacher who’d worked with gangs in New York City and had written a bunch of books about it. He traveled through Houston when I was living here, and so I wrote to him care of the venue. He received the letter, and wrote me back. He sent many letters and scads of free books. I told him that I wasn’t asking for dogma, but was genuinely seeking a relationship with God. He helped me, and I am very grateful to him still, but Christianity was never particularly attractive to me. Too many mediators in the way who wanted me to toe the line. I’m not very good at toeing the line.

Later, in my 20s, I got into New Age stuff for a couple of years, then went back into witchcraft, though from a spiritual rather than a “let me manipulate things” point of view. I was still seeking that connection to the divine. I wasn’t finding it, but I was getting closer. In the mid 1990s, I started to study the kabbalah (before it was vogue with Madonna and all that rot, no pun intended), and around the same time, I gained contact with what people call “spirit guides.” The guide I worked with (with a very close friend of mine) led me to Meridjet. Meridjet is the spirit in “spiritcompanion.com.” He became that connection I sought to the divine.

The traditionally devout are often quick to assume the worst of such situations, fearing demonic interference. People assume that anything spirit that visits you must be blatantly angelic or get lumped into the category of demonic. This is as foolish, in my opinion, as assuming that any person of another race must be either a demonstrated pillar of society or a terrorist waiting for the chance to blow you up. Real life, on any level of reality, is rarely that black and white (again, no pun intended). Life is a multitude of grays, along with blues, yellows, reds, et al. But I digress.

A wise man once said, “Success is your proof.” Someone else, also wise, once said that if something walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck. I’ve been with Meridjet for 15 years, and he has always served my highest good, offered love and acceptance, and never asked for me to do anything in return. All focus has always been on me and my growth. Because of him, I have grown into a very centered person with a compassionate heart and a generous soul. If that’s demonic interference, we should see a lot more of it, for everyone.

If you visit here and decide that I’m crazy or deceived without making a genuine effort to understand and keep an open mind, I can’t stop you. I can only assure you that I exercise as much skepticism and rational analysis as you do; I just do it from a place that has seen far stranger things. If you intend to read this blog, I ask you to examine the evidence, suspend judgment, and watch for as long as you can before deciding one way or the other. We’re not 16 anymore, and hopefully the last thirty years have seen us all grow up, into people with respect for ourselves and for each other.

I’ll admit I haven’t written a single post in this blog over the last two years with the foreknowledge that anyone from my hometown would find it, but clearly I make little effort to hide, either. It was bound to happen eventually, I suppose. In the last three years I’ve co-founded a magazine that features high quality esoteric content, and I’ve been writing a book (as well as editing a few for others) on my experiences with Meridjet in the last fifteen years. Many, many people have sought me out for help with their own spirit friends and guides. The blog is part of an overall effort to share important information with those people — people who, like me, worried that they were losing their minds when they were first contacted.

Thankfully, I’ve reached a place of peace within myself that prevents old memories or peer pressures from intruding upon my calling — because that’s what it is. I may never see Portsmouth, Ohio again, but if I do, it’ll be on my terms as much as it is on yours. You may feel free to comment on this site and ask whatever you like, or to email me, but this is my home on the Web, and as such, I hope you’ll remember your best guest behavior. Welcome, and may we find a common ground.

9 Responses to “To Those Arriving From Facebook (and my past)”

1. Joe Cardenas says:

   4 January 2010 at 13:30

   I’m am so excited to have connected with you – it has been a long time, unfortunately.
   I always feel that I have an open mind and I try an read as much as possible to enlighten myself and to understand other people’s ways and beliefs. My first readings were from Silver RavenWolf – absolutely fascinated by her writings.
   Our quest for understanding is best said by Albert Einstein: ”
   Our situation on this earth seems strange. Every one of us appears here involuntarily and uninvited for a short stay, without knowing the whys and the wherefore.

   Reply
   • sheta says:

     5 January 2010 at 02:37

     That’s a profound quote. Silver Ravenwolf, otoh, isn’t the most widely respected occultist (to put it mildly). She’s a cash machine for her publisher. She’s also the introduction to (neo)Wicca and similar systems for many, many people, and as such is reviled by those who have no patience for newbies. I have two of her books — I try not to judge people I haven’t read, you know? But she is inconsistent, if fascinating. There’s nothing wrong with her stuff as an introduction as long as people don’t take her word as the final authority on a topic.

     Having an open mind and doing your best to understand is all anyone could ever ask. I appreciate that more than you know.

     I’m excited to connect again with you, too! We’re all grown up now, with all of the attendant and accumulated knowledge, changes, and viewpoints that growing up brings. If we can connect in spite of our differences and embrace our similarities, then we gain that much more friendship and shared perspective. So, go us!

     Welcome to the blog and let me know if you have any questions. I’m glad to see you here.

     Reply
2. Ren says:

   4 January 2010 at 20:11

   I think what you’re doing is very brave. Be proud of yourself and what you’ve learned and accomplished!
   Ren´s last blog ..

   Reply
   • sheta says:

     5 January 2010 at 02:40

     It’s funny — I used to have daydreams of attending a high school reunion and “proving” myself, because in school I was in so many ways an outsider. And now — I don’t care! Funny how that works.

     Thank you. I guess everything happens at the right time, indeed.

     Reply
3. Joe Cardenas says:

   5 January 2010 at 15:22

   Hers was the first book I read – so I’m always open for suggestions. Love to hear your reading list suggestions.
   I will say it got me excited to learn more. I also read very openly as well – meaning that I like to find other expressions and opinions and hopefully develop my own beliefs and thoughts
   that’s so wild you mentioned the HS reunion! I went to my 5th (unfortunately it seems only a couple years ago – lol)
   but moved to Los Angeles shortly afterward so I did not go to any others. But I made my way back to Ohio and this summer I received an invite for my 30th HS reunion! I was excited at first but as it drew closer I was reluctant to go, but I ended up getting a call from one of my classmates and ended up going – very surreal. I pretty much did not feel I ever fit in – but definitely glad I opted to go . I used to think about “proving” myself too – But I do my own thing in my own time (Peter Fonda – Easy Rider)

   jc

   Reply
   • sheta says:

     5 January 2010 at 16:14

     Before I give you a reading list, I’d like to know what direction you’d like to go in terms of learning. There are many. Any idea what you’d like to read about?

     So what happened at the reunion?

     Reply
4. Joe Cardenas says:

   6 January 2010 at 10:15

   I would say general interest – I am not sure of any specific direction – thanks

   the reunion was not what I was thinking – my first thoughts were that it was going to be a lot of “I’m doing this” etc it was more reminiscing – photos came out – just general catching up – it did not seem that much time had passed – for the most part I started school in first grade – HS with everyone, then we graduated and went our separate lives
   I only kept up with a couple but that was pretty much for about a year – then I pretty much got immersed in my work at OSU and filmmaking – then I moved to LA
   so it was reacquainting with people I grew up with – but somewhere lost track
   I enjoyed seeing them again

   Reply
5. Teena in Toronto says:

   14 January 2010 at 18:27

   Happy blogoversary

   Reply
   • sheta says:

     14 January 2010 at 18:44

     Thanks! lol I didn’t notice it til you said something.

     Reply

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