Funky, Weird, and Out of Sorts

There’s so much to say and so many things going on lately that my mind is actually blank. I don’t know where to start or what to include, and let me tell you: it’s a rare day that I’m at a loss for words to put in my blog. This mood, whatever it is, is unusual enough that I can’t readily identify it.

There’s been a strange dichotomy in the events in my life lately, more diametrically opposed than the average day’s routine would typically include. For instance, there have been an inordinate number of large creepy-crawlies in my house and in my bedroom, which I find highly upsetting. There’s been an opposite in the form of (for example) extra encounters with soft, fluffy animals and, more meaningfully, a noticeable change of attitude in my daughter with regard to helping out and exhibiting thoughtfulness. On the negative side, again, there has been an adverse reaction to medication that has removed any semblance of good temper that I normally have. The usual patient Sheta has been replaced by PodSheta of the Snarling Responses and Hair-Trigger Rage. Opposite of that stressful issue, our income has increased enough that I’ve almost caught up with my bills (not counting a really large debt with my previous electric company that will take a while to pay down). And so it goes.

In blogland, the idea of writing paid posts reminds me of the concept of charging for spiritual counseling or tarot readings or magick work: It leaves a bad taste in one’s mouth, but one can’t always figure out exactly why it does. Attempting to make money in any venture that is supposed to be done for pleasure seems to leave people – both participants and observers – with the idea that one has “sold out” or has compromised one’s integrity. I vacillate on it, myself, but mostly feel that any distaste on my own part stems from a deeper fear of judgment rather than the feeling that I am somehow wrong to desire prosperity in a job I happen to enjoy.

I’ve so far never managed to make any money participating in spiritual or magical occupations, except for the occasional donation. Wait, that’s not true. In Seattle, I had a clientele for tarot readings. I grew to dislike the job, because the regular customers were always desperate people seeking any sort of reassurance or validation for their dreams. I dislike constantly repeating myself for someone who apparently believes that repeated inquiries will eventually deliver the answers they seek. I also dislike being in the frequent company of desperate and needy people who are clinging to me for those answers, when I am unable to provide them honestly and refuse to string them along. I’ll gently deliver the truth, and that’s all. (This sounds a lot like me – desperate, needy, and clinging in fear – regarding close friends I’ve had in the last 15 years. This is an issue currently being addressed in psychotherapy. Evidently I have an abandonment schema. Who knew?)

I successfully sold very nifty and unique dreamcatchers in Seattle, as well, but even when coupled with reading cards, it wasn’t enough to survive on. Here, I had one magical client I tried to help who reeked from day one of desperate. I tried very hard to help him, but like so many he declined to accept any personal responsibility. A friend of mine talked me into signing up for those online psychic counselor sites – Keen, Kisamba, et al. I found the entire enterprise extremely distasteful and didn’t stay with it long. You can still find my profiles in Google, much to my dismay. I’ve also had a friend or two donate funds for my assistance with various spiritual issues, but a donation is not the same as bluntly charging someone a fee and carries neither the stigma nor the guilt of any spiritual fee-based service.

Rending the Veil is the closest I’ve come to a legitimate occult-oriented business plan. I even have a business license for it, but so far my webmaster and I have not implemented any fee-based areas of the site, and the donation box atrophied until I removed it. It may work out over time, and it may stay 100% free forever.

So my newest little venture is the pay-for-posting thingamajig, and after doing one whole paid post I am already suffering the unease I involuntarily attach to ventures to turn a profit that end up feeling more like exploitation. I’m not sure why. Perhaps it’s the fact that I’ve lost a handful of subscribers recently, but that could be attributed to the simple lack of new content. Perhaps it’s from my struggle with SocialSpark.com, a site I found to be horrendously put together and impossible to sensibly navigate (even for a seasoned internet junkie). I had a post all ready for them, and was unable to find the required code to include, despite searching the site for a good two hours. In the course of trying to track down the location via the non-functional php FAQ and reading the forums, I learned a great deal about the bugs in the system and decided to scrap the post. There’s no way I could truthfully encourage anyone to join the site when I can’t navigate it. (It eventually turned out that the “posting opportunity” had been suspended but was still sending out invitations, and that was why the code was missing. The opp itself was still in the listings, which made it all that much more confusing. It wasn’t until two days later that I learned the reason for the screwup.)

I’ve made one paid post, and I may make more in the future, but they’re going to be unusual rather than frequent because 1) too many eager bloggers, too few advertisers; 2) I don’t qualify for a lot of them cuz my Google Rank is nil (yeah, up yours, Google); 3) I won’t endorse anything I don’t know or don’t like; and 4) that whole eww feeling.

I started this post last night and, ha ha, ended up with food poisoning that kept me up sick all night and most of the pre-noon hours. I’m just here to finish this and then it’s back to bed with me; I need the rest. My initial goal here was to simply touch base and let you all know that I haven’t abandoned this blog. I’m having to make some scheduling adjustments, but I’ll be back asap (hopefully later tonight) with content that’s much more interesting. Until then, ciao.

Sheta Kaey About Sheta Kaey

I teach people to perceive, communicate, and work with spirits. Beyond that, I'm kinda normal.

Sometimes I write things. Sometimes I edit things. Sometimes, people even see them.

Comments

  1. I’m trying to start up my own divination clients for pay, and it’s not easy to find the people in the beginning.
    One thing that has been drummed into me in some of my learning has been that exchange of money=exchange of energy. Even if you love doing it and would do it for free, people seem to appreciate it more if they pay. Besides, something like Tarot, you’ve done a lot of study there, correct? Receiving money for your skill is no different than paying someone for their “mundane” skills.

    Solis last blog post..Snapshot of life

    • I’ve read tarot for over 35 years and know it deeply. And I agree on the concept of being worthy of compensation as much as anyone else with a skill. But the people who usually end up being “customers” (or at least preferred customers) are typically people I already know, and they therefore feel slighted if charged by a friend. So it’s either hold everyone at a distance and charge for services across the board, or get to know people and work for free til they know the value of the service, then apply a fee. It seems to be a lose-lose situation. I don’t want customers that only think of my skills in terms of how to help them find miracle cures to their everyday, mundane problems, and the people who have a need for real metaphysical help don’t want to be charged.

      • Out of curiosity, how often do you read for people now? If it’s semi-often maybe you can at least ask for some kind of payment. Whether it be money or a tangible token/gift.

        Don’t mind me, I am being a Leo and honorary Virgo at the same time.

        Solis last blog post..Thankful Thursday

  2. I don’t do tarot for people as much now as I do counseling for people with spirit companions. I help them strengthen contact and various other stuff, and I’ve done a LOT of it over the last five years or so. I also do general spiritual counseling at a pretty intensive level, and it tends to be largely without any sort of appointment or formal setup. Strangers who come to me end up as friends, and I hate charging anyone point blank. It’s just hard for me to say, “yeah, sure, please insert your debit card into my PayPal account first.” lol

    • Hmm, I haven’t gotten any kind of comment reply from the site. Just checking back periodically.

      I think I understand your perspective, but it is still a shame in my opinion that you don’t get back something tangible. (not to discount allies and friends either, but the token of your effort is nice too.)

      Solis last blog post..

  3. FWIW, my perspective on providing professional level services for people has always been that there needs to be “fair exchange” — and that it’s a *choice* for me to decide when, or whether, to provide “pro bono” services for individual people on the basis of who really needs the help and can’t afford to pay, and for the occasional friend as well.

    Here’s an idea: perhaps you could set up a “Spiritual Tutoring/Education” business (if it’s set up correctly, it could even be a 501c3 nonprofit) off of your site here as an option for people to take advantage of, and have those you counsel & teach pay a fee for individual tutoring, on a per-session basis.

    If they come through that link on your site, you’ll know they want your professional services — and you can also refer ppl who look you up on IM to that link [after you’ve helped them with their immediate problem] as a way to thank you for something they’ve found to be of benefit to them (so, again, you’ll retain the *choice* of what or whether to charge, but you will have a convenient method of receiving payment right out there on your site for people to use — and that alone increases your chances of receiving payment from none at all to yes! :) ).

    I wouldn’t set it up as a donation link — for me, if it appears on a website, a donation link says that no professional services are being given in person by anyone: it’s just a way to give some money to help the *site* pay for itself, not as remuneration for services rendered. If you are giving of yourself — your time, talents, and experience — being paid for your work is a very reasonable thing to expect. And if you set your business up as some form of educational opportunity you won’t end up with the kind of clients you end up with when you offer tarot reading.

    If I can be of further assistance, as always, just ask :)

    *Best,*

    –Meri

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